We’ ve heard that change is inevitable, that the only constant thing is change. We all know it, we all see it in our everyday lives. As time passes, we see how it affects our bodies when we don’ t move the way we used to, our children as they grow up and take their own journey( hopefully), our families as they age and how in reality, it happens constantly in every area. Time marches on relentlessly and change follows closely in its footsteps. How do we deal with change? Do we sit complacently by as change takes over our decisions, or do we refuse to acquiesce and take charge of the flow of our lives to live to a better expression of ourselves and for more fulfillment? Socrates encouraged mankind in his infinite wisdom to not give too much attention to our adversity, for nothing in life is permanent. How do we adapt and gain progress for ourselves rather than just accepting what is offered without question as we allow the days of our lives to wash over us and suffer what we don’ t desire and even sometimes suffer the things we do. I know I have been there, we all have, where the days just seem to run us and we don’ t understand“ how we got where we are”. I found myself in that position in a very shocking and unpleasant way a few years ago and it was a wake up call for how I needed to start adapting to the changes of life that I couldn’ t control and realizing the truth about myself.
There are three things that I know for sure about dealing with change. The first one is that you have to be conscious. I was unconscious in my day to day life when I woke up one day to a very unsavory and‘ life changing’ message on Facebook. That lack of awareness came at a very steep price.
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Self awareness in our every day and staying in tune with how we react or respond to whatever life throws at us is critical to knowing whether or not our actions serve us or puts us in a place of suffering.
The second thing is knowing ourselves. In my programs with the horses, we delve deeply into self discovery and answering the ultimate question,“ Who am I”?. When we say the words“ I am”, whatever we follow those words with defines us. It creates our identity for ourselves in our mind. If we say I am successful, happy, tired, ugly, fat, etc. with enough emotion and conviction, we will start believing it over time. And what we believe is who we are. I started to discover that for myself when I asked that question and truly listened to the answer. That was one of the gifts my horses gave me, because, like mirrors, they are a true reflection of who we are, without judgment or malice or ill-intent, they tell us the truth if we’ re open to listen.
The third and final piece of the puzzle is decision. What do we do with the lemons life throws us at high speed without warning? In the past, if someone would tell me to make them into lemonade and I would want to scream. They obviously didn’ t see what kind of pain I was in and my pain was really important! What I realized was that although feeling the pain was important as a motivator and a teacher, I needed to make decisions based in my truth and how I was showing up. Sometimes we have to acknowledge that getting hit by the car may have meant we were standing in traffic, that although life presents the unexpected and undesirable in the moment, that sometimes it’ s there for us, not to us and let’ s face it, we were there to receive it in that time and space, like it or not.
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Jen Zoë Hall with her horse Tres
Ultimately what we do with the changes in our lives has to do with the questions we ask and the beliefs we’ ve built over our lifetime. Dealing with rescued horses and people has taught me that. How do we break free from the negative patterns and let go of the emotional charge we feel when presented with change? Are we making decisions purposefully and with consciousness or are we basing our decisions on negative emotions triggered by the changes life throws at us and the filters of our past?
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Living life as we’ re meant to … on our terms, in flow with harmony and peace is something most of us want even if we don’ t know it. In order to get that, it requires we acknowledge change, look into the mirror of ourselves and stay true to who we are as we make our decisions in response to that change.
The key to a fully purposeful life is to not have life live us, but rather us live life, be present and enjoy each moment in its beauty and perfection, even when it’ s not the way we think it should be. These realizations are now something I live by and share with others through the expression of my horses and the experiences at Zenerjen. It has served me well, especially during the storms. So the next time you get some change you don’ t want, ask yourself the hard questions, listen to your truth, believe in yourself and that my friends, will change your life. n
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PHOTO COURTESY OF JEN ZOË HALL |
42 IBA Success Magazine n VOL 4, Issue 3 |